dreams and aspirations.

Every little girl has a dream. Some dream about the perfect fairy tale wedding and being a princess. My dream was a bit different (not to say being a fairy tale princess wouldn't be nice, but lets be realistic). Every since I was young, it was my dream and life goal to work with HIV/AIDS patients in Africa. It was one of those dreams as a girl, not sure where it came from, if it would ever come to be but I knew that is all I wanted to do before I die. In my mind I had 80 ish years to accomplish this goal.

There I was, 19 years old, sat in a rural clinic of Mukoma, Rwanda counting out large white pills for this dying decrepit woman, clearly losing her battle to AIDS. It hit me in that moment, with that particular woman, I remember it as clear as day. At 19 years old I was in the midst of accomplishing my life goal. Wow, what a blessing it was to be in that moment realizing what I was actually doing. Barley a year out of high school, I realized I was young and beyond blessed to have the ability to not only actually accomplish my goal but at such a young age. But hey, I was 19, my life was barley beginning and I needed another life goal. I mean I still had what 60, 70 years maybe?

Within the next year or so in college my new life goal and dream began to form. I wanted to help start a clinic in a third world country. Now this was a more long term goal for me. Thinking that, okay I will become a nurse, work, have a family, save money for year and years, and maybe when I am 40 or 50, I can begin to work at accomplishing this goal. It has always been a long term dream, and never did I ever actually think it was tangible. Starting a clinic is expensive, time consuming, and take a lot of dedication.

It hit me again today. At 23 years old, here I am about to venture off into the world of helping to start a clinic in a third world country. What?! I thought to myself, I have known what I am going to India to do, and I know what my long term life dream was, but I never put them together, until it clicked today.

I always had a vague picture in my mind of how it would be, how I would go about this momentousness task. This is never what I had in mind, but God knew all along and I couldn't be more thrilled. It just goes to remind me that when God's hand is at work in what you are doing and working towards, its hard yes, but you realize it was never in your hands in the first place and it much easier to just let God do His thing.

So, here is to the next chapter in my life. At 23, never did I ever think I would have been the places I have been, seen the things I have seen, experienced the things I have experienced and met so many amazing people, but I have. Why has God blessed me immensely? Good question. But if this is only the first 23 years, my gosh I can not even begin to fathom what He has in store for the rest. I can only be filled with joy and smile when thinking of what is to come.

I guess it is a good thing that I am an ambitious and driven person, but I feel I have accomplished my life goals so early, where do I go next? I pray that God begin to lay the next dream and goal on my heart, but lets get through the next few months in India first!

Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for the orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you--James 1:27

And so that is what I strive for.